You Can Never Go Back!

After Dr Hubby died, my first trip to my Moms was quite hard for me....  He was my side kick/rode shotgun so  to say.

Well, Mom immediately asked me if I was going to move home.  Trying hard to explain to her that I had lived in my little town for 49 years.  My kids grew up there, my Church and friends were there.  Everyone knows my Name thing.....feel on deaf ears..... 

I had lived in her home she and Dad built in the early 60's five years.  I had worked at Scott and White Hospital and could again if I wanted too.... which I smiled to myself.... She thinks I'm still a kid.  At  102 almost.... a 67 daughter is a youngster.    Alot of my friends still lived there she added....  

I looked around the old house and remembered Dad, who died when I was 20 and little brother who just turned 60..... of parties they gave me and sleep overs.... Of old boyfriends who made my heart leap and the smell of leather football jackets they let me wear.  Of good-night kisses on the front porch....and break ups and make ups.....

Dad always fried chicken and made mashed potatoes and gravey and chocolate cupcakes on "home game" nights, and the cheerleaders came home with me, and ate and went to the game from my house located a little way from the School/football field.....I really did not want to be a cheerleader, but Mom wanted me too.....  I remember begging my Senior year .... Please don't let me run.... I want to chill out this year.

Where had that young girl gone?  Friends had died andmany moved to Dallas/Ft. Worth....Austin..  Very few remained  there.....  Young people with dreams and yearnings..... Wars and divorces, babies and jobs...

NO, I could not come back here...  My grandson lives just 70 miles from me and I enjoy him so much and daughter depends on me from time to time.... No, I could not come back ........

As I was leaving to head back home, my Mom asked, "are you going to rent one or both of those empty bedrooms"?  No I replied, I enjoy being alone ..... WELL SHE SAID, " I'D BE SCARED SOMEONE WAS HIDING IN THEM.."       ..... Thanks Mom, 

She refuses to move in with me..... She has her 42 Club that meets on Tuesdays at her house.....She has her friends, and her Church and my Brother 10 miles away when he's home.....and her memories in that big ol house....my cousins close by.....